Time for a state check!

For all of you reading my Inner Dialogue on this blog, I just want to give you a hug and a name check. And the name of a good therapist. But I can’t namecheck you, because I’m not totally sure who some of you are.

Instead, how about a state check? Come here. you crazy lurker from...
...Kentucky! Thanks for tuning in almost every day! Your devotion is questionable but appreciated! And I love your marketing suggestions! (Well, the ones that aren’t guano loco, anyway.) Please keep commenting. You are less of a hassle than you might think!

Illinois! I think I know who you are, but I...(scrunching up face; shaking head; frustrated exhale)...I simply can’t be sure. Could I have possibly worked with you in the recent past? Maybe if you took off that mask and put down the whip. (On second thought, keep the whip.) Maybe I’m wrong about you, but I’m rightfully grateful that you keep coming back. Reinventing myself is weird and terrifying and unpredictable and...necessary. Thanks for tuning in to the drama.

Oregon! Who are you? You have me genuinely stumped. I’d like to give you your Frequent Visitors’ card, but you’ve stopped coming recently. Maybe you’re a ghost. Maybe someone is simply pinging you from out of state. The Welcome Mat is frozen under some permafrost in Ohio right now, but you’re always invited to return.

New York! Or should I say, “New York, New York!”, because I think there’s more than one of you. Thanks for returning to check out the resume, lurk, and sensibly leave before you’re asked to. If you’re some old Nickelodeon or Turner friends, I avert my eyes in humility and respect.

Georgia! Y’all are fickle! Y’all only visit when I ask you to. Y’all never bring drinks or food or leave any comments! I love ya, but you make it tough. I will NEVER grovel for your love and attention. I don’t need ANYTHING from you!! (Please come back.)

Ohio and Ohio and Ohio and Ohio (and the occasional Ohio): my fan base! I’m fairly certain I know who all of you are even though many of you are clustered up in the Dayton region. I’m really grateful that you tune in. Each and every one of you is important to me. Thank you, Cincinnati, Cleveland, Dayton, and...New Bremen?! Thanks for reading and commenting and being here.

I hope I keep entertaining and inspiring and moving forward into the new year. Or at least I can continue to serve as the guy whose life is more screwed up than yours. Keep leaving those intellectual bread crumbs - your comments - and I’ll keep feeding you squirrels! More soon!
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